Wise Family: Cinco de Maya

On May 5th we celebrated our second anniversary with Maya. She doesn't really understand the significance of this yet. To her, it's like another birthday. In the afternoon we went to a birthday party of a friend. Then we had a special dinner for Maya. My mom made her a pink cake with 2 candles that she got to blow out. At bedtime instead of the usual books we looked at a photo album of our trip to Vietnam together. She loves seeing the pictures of herself. She has not started to ask any hard questions yet. I'm sure those days will come.

After 2 years together, we are much better adjusted. Looking back I realize that it took us almost two years to get used to each other. The first year was really hard. The boys had to adjust to sharing their parents, grandparents and their home with another little person. I had to learn how to manage 3 children (now 4 at home). Maya had to learn how to eat and talk. She is now potty trained (during the day), goes to preschool, plays with lots of friends and speaks in full sentences (most of the time). She still loves books, music and electronics. She is still very feisty, sassy, willful and headstrong. She is also very curious, smart, sweet and affectionate.

She asks endless questions. It can be very exasperating. I have to remind myself that she is learning and wants to know everything about the world around her. Sometimes she asks questions she already knows the answer to just to talk, or keep us engaged. Sometimes I don't know what she is really asking me. For example: I showed her a feather that I found. She asked me "Why it feather?". What does that mean? So I asked her, "What do you mean? Why did I pick it up? Why did the bird lose a feather? Why do birds have feathers instead of fur?". Then I say, "Birds have feathers so they can fly and stay warm." She seemed satisfied and says "Oh." Sometimes when I don't get the answer right and she cannot reform the question, she says "Never mind!". I guess she gets exasperated with me as well.

She loves all animals except for flies. She is still terrified of flies. She likes baby worms but not big worms. She prefers playing with dinosaurs to playing with dolls. She loves to swim, especially in the hot tub. She still loves to be in tiny spaces, like boxes and closets. She loves tools of all kinds. She loves to jump on trampolines. She loves water slides. She would probably love roller coasters if we had one. She is not afraid of anything, except flies. She cannot take our word for anything. She has to experience it for herself. That scares me when I think about her as an adolescent. I think my biggest challenge will be finding ways to channel her energy in creative and positive ways, so that she doesn't have to rebel. As her preschool teacher said last week: "I try to avoid power struggles with Maya, because I know who will win."